Thursday, May 3, 2007

What Happens When People Care


Call me a sucker for a happy ending, but I burst into joyful tears when I saw this photo and e-vite from my friends J&K, a couple with hearts bigger than Texas. It was an invitation to celebrate an adoption of two children they aren't related to and whom they could have felt sorry for, written a check, and moved on. But they didn't.

(That's a photo of Victor and Vanessa with their adoptive parents, and the judge who made it official.)

My friends J&K were able to see the bigger picture that these two children faced, put aside their daily concerns and stretch the boundaries of their good will, patience and budget to give the kids a fighting chance at life.

J&K both have busy careers, two young sons with full schedules of Little League and school activities, a house to maintain, interests and hobbies of their own...... But when their longtime nanny was run down and killed in a crosswalk on Coast Highway in October 2005 by an inattentive lady in her big SUV, J&K (I suspect they'd rather I didn't use their names) saw the handwriting on the wall for these two, then ages 3 and 8, and recognized a harsh and uncertain future for them.

With the children destined to end up in foster care and with no guarantee that they would be kept together, J&K took them into their home for nine months as temporary foster parents. An optimistic and cheerful couple, I know this move was a big drain on their emotional and financial resources and a strain on the family unit, but to them it was never a question. They patiently facilitated the eventual movement of the children to another foster home of a generous family with financial resources, a similar ethnic background and a fervent desire for more children to love. That foster family officially adopted Victor and Vanessa on April 16th.

I'll happily attend that party, grateful for the opportunity to know J&K and to have observed the real "Secret" -- that we are here to help each other even -- perhaps especially -- if it takes us outside our comfort zone. That they cared enough to go to bat for the futures of Victor and Vanessa demonstrates that bravery comes in many forms, and sometimes it lives quietly just down the street.